5. Pretty much anything that falls in the category of "random, ugly shit".
4. I love you but don't tell me your shit don't stink. Some things just aren't meant to be shared. Tandem toilets are out.
3. Along those same lines. If you think the only way to say I love you is with some fake poop. You have serious mental issues that need to be addressed.
2. Anything with disparaging nicknames probably isn't gonna fly. Ho, Bitch, Wench, Big Tits McGee. All are a no go.
1. Anything that says "I love you, baby. But I'd love you more if you looked like this."
So, there it is. I hope no one is having to make a run to their local Wal-Mart right now to return a gift. Because if you do, quite frankly, you suck. That is all.
5 comments:
I actually considered the tandem toilet. But since we don't live together and you poo so infrequently I ultimately decided against it. But, please, just picture how awesome a make out session could be on one of those.
OMG!!! I'm puking in my half of the toilet right now.
ummmm. so the whole flask thing is out? Guess I'm glad I didn't buy the one that said cougar...
Actually...I kinda liked the flask.
I KNEW IT! Damn.
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